Social Media vs. Mental Health

Until very recently, you weren't able to find me on any of the major social media platforms that allow you to follow, like, or show your digital approval in any way. And no... it's not because of "The Social Dilemma" documentary (which I must admit I still haven't seen.)

Although I'm sure my reasons for taking a social media sabbatical are related to what (I imagine) was portrayed in this hyped-up documentary; I'd like to share a little more about my personal vendetta -- eh, I mean... relationship -- with social media.

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You see, I used to use Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest as online business tools for nearly three years. This was back when I had an established travel brand and was working as an online business coach, advising starting entrepreneurs how to leverage social media & digital marketing.

Don't get me wrong, these were some of the best times of my life.

But after nearly three years of doing this work, I started noticing a few things...

• Travel didn't feel like leisure anymore, it felt like work & didn't enjoy it as much as I used to;

• I felt immense pressure to keep traveling, to keep creating, to keep posting;

• Any joy I felt from milestones or accomplishments lasted shorter & shorter;

• Even on planned "offline days" I was unable to fully disconnect & stop thinking about work;

And because my work was so intertwined with social media,

I couldn't see social media as anything but work.

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It wasn't until I was forced to confront myself with my deteriorating mental health, after 5 months of feeling deeply unhappy... that I made a life-changing decision.

I quit.

Everything.

I put an end to the online business I had successfully been building for years. I deactivated all my social media accounts, I deleted all the apps & went good ol' fashioned "offline".

The idea was to stay offline for a few months only, but deep down I already knew I would need a much longer break... The first few weeks of my "life offline," I noticed that whenever I grabbed my phone I would almost on auto-pilot swipe to the folder where I used to store my social media apps.

This was an incredibly strange sensation, and a clear confirmation I had made the right decision.

But after the initial two weeks of social media rehab, I started noticing something else...

• I noticed a heightened ability to be more present in the moment;

• In addition, I felt a relief of pressure, because I didn't have to document my every single move anymore;

• I also felt a sense of anonymity and freedom. Since I wasn't posting anything anywhere, nobody knew where I was or what I was up to; unless I wanted them to know and told them directly the old-fashioned way -- by pigeon courier.
  

It felt like I was taking back control of my life, my time, and my mental health.

Those few months offline slowly turned into two years. Oh, and what a blissful two years it was...

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I wouldn't have even considered getting back on social media in this lifetime, had I not realigned with my life purpose as a coach. But not a business coach -- no. After all these years of healing, self-reflection and digging deeper, I had finally realized that the way I was meant to serve others wasn't by supporting them with their professional business, but with their personal everything (which naturally affects their business, too).

I knew social media could be used for good, and I wanted to be part of that side of it again.

That being said, I definitely took my sweet time reintroducing social media back into my life...

I reflected and I brainstormed, and I made a decision about which platforms I wanted to use and which I absolutely did not want to use again. In the same way I decided that my approach towards every platform would be different from before, as well.

This time around, I'm not putting pressure on myself with posting schedules, but I'm trying to be my most authentic self in everything I post. My aim is to create a digital "community" of people who are supportive and who value self-development, growth, and mental health.

My focus won't be on marketing myself to as many clients as possible, either. Instead my focus will be on authenticity and providing quality content for those interested. I know that if I do that, I will attract whoever needs my services, organically.

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In addition to my adjusted approach, there are a few other things I've implemented to keep my (new) relationship with social media as healthy as possible:

1. My social media app icons cannot be found on my mobile 'home page'. Instead, I have to swipe a few times to get to them, removing that "easy access" factor;

2. My app notifications are off for all social media & messaging apps, in addition to my phone being on silent most of the time. This way my attention cannot be "grabbed" at any time, and I cannot involuntarily be taken out of the moment I'm in... Instead I am in control of my attention and my time, and I can choose when I want to dedicate both to checking my apps;

3. I've turned off the "like count" on Instagram, which is something that wasn't available yet *back in my day*. It helps fight the "like validation" addiction, and instead makes you focus on the quality of the content you are seeing;

4. Last but not least, I am very conscious about who and what I follow on each platform. It matters so much in determining what your feed looks like, and whether it will be uplifting, educational, and supportive; or if it will make you feel insecure, anxious, and comparison-prone.

In conclusion, I believe that as long as you are mindful about your use of social media, it does not have to have a negative affect on your mental health.

And the good news is, YOU are the one in control. If you know you currently have an unhealthy relationship with social media, know that having that awareness is Step 1 -- you're off to a great start already! Admitting that something needs to change for the better is Step 2. And taking action in that direction is Step 3.

Breaking unhealthy habits is challenging, and at times terrifying, but never impossible.

If you need some support along the way, I'm here for you. Feel free to reach out via email or connect with me through any of my socials.

'Cause now you can!

P.S. If you are looking for a little more guidance, book a free 30 minute coaching session with me. We will explore your unique needs and goals together, and discover what coaching can do for you.

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